Is Your Child a Leader or a Bully?
By guest blogger Dr. Shirin Sherkat
Do you want to create a leader in your kid, not a bully?
Then make sure that your kids are skilled in:
- Coping with change
- Asserting themselves
- Having empathy
Can your child cope with change?
Coping with change means your kids are learning how to manage stress due to transition, change or crises. Where do they learn such coping skills? From watching you of course.
- Allow them to vent. Give them the words to express their frustration and anger.
- Teach them that it is OK to feel angry.
- Model stress management techniques such as, deep breathing.
Is your child assertive?
It is essential for a child to learn to assert themselves so they can communicate well enough to get their needs met & learn to stand up for their rights.
- When you learn to take your kid’s point of view and respect it, you teach your child how to take another’s point of view into consideration.
- They learn to respect others’ rights and perspective.
- When you give positive feedback and praise for good choices, you teach your child to appreciate other’s behavior as well.
- When you empower your kids to make better choices, you create a responsible individual.
Empathy can be taught
Every day you model and set an example for your kids for how to express empathy towards others in need, or respect others’ feelings.
Daily routines are full of wonderful, teachable moments to help foster empathy in your kids:
- Listen: Allow kids to talk about their feelings, and validate those feelings.
- Be patient. Be present. And just listen first. Offer validation later.
- Label: From a very young age, your kids can learn the correct label for body language and facial expressions.
- For example, you could say, “look sweetie, that little girl feels sad, look at her face.” Or “I can see that you feel scared.”
- Model: Through practice, show your kids how different behaviors influence the way others feel.
- For example, during an outing to the grocery store, you may come across an opportunity to explain, “I saw how that lady felt very frustrated in the store, so I offered to help.”
This is an excerpt from my book “Create Happy Kids” – If you would like to enjoy the entire book, you can purchase it by clicking here.
I am available to do Parent Education Workshops, either Private or PTA Sponsored
Contact Shirin Sherkat at 425-772-6698